Natalia’s room is finally finished!!! I’m so proud of my hard work. I painted her entire room, night table and dresser, handmade her night table runner and most of her decorations. I also spent LOTS of money with all the “extras” to make this nursery absolutely perfect for my baby girl. Sadly, she will be 3 months in 3 days and is JUST now starting to spend time in her own room, lol!
Happy Mother’s Day to all the wonderful mom’s out there! But especially to my mom because I wouldn’t be who I am today without her ♥
This is my very first Mother’s Day and I must say it was nothing short of amazing. I woke up to a bunch of mothers day wishes from several of my facebook friends. Jacob completely surprised my mom and I by coming to our house in Lake City all the way from Jacksonville with flowers and cards for each of us. I was so happy to see him and to get the biggest bouquet of flowers EVER in my life! He gave my mom beautiful peach tulips that open during the day and close at night. We got dressed up a little bit and took some picture. My mom made a delicious shrimp sauce over white rice for our special dinner and I made cream cheese pull apart monkey bread or dessert. Also, we finally opened Jacobs beer cake and had a couple drinks. It was the first alcoholic beverage I’ve had in over a year which I’m proud to say, so a couple is all I needed. I couldn’t have imagined a more perfect way to spend my first mother’s day. Especially because I didn’t expect anything on this holiday.
Being a mom is an indescribable feeling. I enjoy every single little thing about it. Most people would say that it gets tiring and aggravating, but I have yet to feel that way, honestly. My daughter amazes me every second of the day. Fortunately being a stay-at-home mom means that I don’t miss any part of her growing up, especially during this time when she is growing so quickly. It’s as if she’s growing right before my eyes! I notice progress every day, it’s incredible.
Being a young mom (I’m 20 years old) is another stereotype that I “fall under” which I’m not at all ashamed of it. As a matter of fact, I prefer being a young mom versus an older mom because I can grow with my daughter as well as being able to do things with her while we’re both young. I love the fact that I ALWAYS have somebody to go somewhere with. I enjoy the fact that being a mom is a job that I love without being paid, I love that being on call 24/7 gives me something to do since I hate the feeling of not having anything to do, and I love the fact that I am so lucky to have a good baby that gives me opportunities not to have to do anything.
The littlest things she does helps me discover her unique personality every day. Things like her falling into a dead sleep when she’s laying on me. I can go walking around, talking loud, going here going there, she won’t wake up. But as soon as I put her down, no more than 3 minutes later she starts crying realizing that I’m not there anymore. As soon as I pick her up, she stops and falls right back asleep. Is that not the cutest thing ever? It fills me with love.
She’ll probably love pedicures, or getting foot massages because she LOVES when you play with her feet. It calms her down almost every time she fusses.
I have rarely heard stories of babies who don’t cry during bath time, but Natalia doesn’t. She loves bath time and the feeling of her body being massaged with warm water and getting clean. I wash her head full of hair real good which she appreciates I’m sure.
She will probably be a morning person because she’s always in such a good mood when she wakes up, and usually “cranky” or fussy at night if I wait too long to put her to bed. Early riser, early sleeper; opposite of me.
She’s starting to turn her head to follow me wherever I go. I even read in an article sent to my email about baby stages for her age (which is 1 month and 10 days old today) that she will start recognizing people, sounds, and environments. I have been noticing that Natalia seems to know who her grandma is, and where her changing table is, and things like that. I imagine that she’s thinking “This is where she changes my diaper. Yay, Thanks mom!”, lol. She knows when it’s time to get changed because she’ll cry, and if she has a dirty diaper, I lay her down and start messing with her diaper and the crying stops. She used to cry all the way until you were entirely done, all the way to you snapping the last side. 😀
She’s very sensitive. Every little thing bothers her, from her clothes being uncomfortable, her seat being too hot or cold, her mouth is wet, when she has the littlest bit of poop in her diaper, every little thing. She’ll probably be a neat freak or perhaps a perfectionist like her mother. (;
She gets bored easily, which means she’ll probably be a busy body, not lazy thank God! She gets tired of being in one room too long and enjoys walking around (or being carried around) so she can look at different things. I feel like this will make her a curious person, someone who wants to learn new things. She seems to enjoy it when I go outside with her. I think the fresh air, sunlight and the company of animals makes her calm and happy. It’s adorable.
What’s even more adorable is that my 3 little dogs seem to know that she’s a baby, that she’s my baby. Shoot, they knew when I was pregnant, they could feel it. I could tell. They acted different. I remember them sniffing my belly as if they knew there was a little being in there. When I brought the baby home the dogs were so curious to see her and sniff her. I let them sniff her little foot and it was as if they knew she was my baby and accepted her right away. It was interesting to see the dogs and the way they reacted. Even the youngest of them, Bandit, acts like her big brother. When she cries, her runs to where the cry is coming from, barks, then runs back to us and barks again as if saying “Hey, hey! The baby’s crying!”. It’s the funniest, cutest little thing.
I love it when she’s feeding, and she has her hands holding me and closing and opening her fingers over and over again. It tickles sometimes, but it’s such an amazing feeling to feel those tiny little hands that I made kneading on me like a kitten nursing on their mommy. Sometimes I’ll look away, and when I look back down at her I catch her staring at me. It’s a very touching experience, I love it so much.
Every little detail of everything about her fills my entire body with love. Even things like her crying and her poop. She cries like a little lamb and says “mmbaaaaaaaaaa!” and I can’t help but think how adorable she sounds. Her poop is nasty, but then she acts so cool and cute about getting changed that I forget all about how nasty it is. Even her farts and burps are cute! They’re so loud she makes me think there’s another adult in the room with us, lol! That little girl is so funny she could be a comedian already. 😀
The way Natalia stares at me while I do my hair, or put on my makeup is another thing she does that melts my heart. I can already tell she’s going to love hair and makeup just like me. ❤
All the little things she does and the things I notice make me enjoy being a mom so much more. I even told my mom last night that I loved being a mom. She told me that I loved it more than she did, and that made me feel good, or more confident that I was a good mom because my mom was a wonderful mother to me and my sister. (:
I ordered a bunch of pictures of her and of me when I was pregnant to start scrap booking and decorating the baby book.
By the way, my apologies for the slack on blogging. I have been very busy enjoying every minute of Natalia’s life and getting things organized that I haven’t found the time to write any posts. But that will change. I plan to get back to my crafts that I want to finish, scrap booking, and getting things ready for college that I’m going to start this year in August. But that’s for another post later on. (:
One more thing, one of my very good friends Ashley took some professional photos of my little family which will be posted later on as well. Here’s a sneak peek to see what you have to look forward to! ♥
Well here’s the post everyone’s been waiting for. I’m going to start from the very beginning:
At 41 weeks, Jacob and I started doing everything, literally EVERYTHING, to induce my labor. From eating spicy food, going on bumpy rides every single day, walking until my feet felt like they would fall off (BTW I didn’t swell during my entire pregnancy because I drank plenty of water), doing the dirty, acupressure, massages, bananas, yoga, stripping my membranes (twice!), whatever you can think of, we did it, and NOTHING WORKED. So my conclusion on inducing labor based on my personal experience is that nothing can induce labor, your baby comes whenever he/she decides to come.
I was scheduled to be induced Monday morning, and as much as I was opting not to be induced, I was going to let them because one, it would be safer for the baby not to exceed 42 weeks in utero, and two I would be more than ready at that point for Natalia to be here. Fortunately my water finally broke the Friday afternoon prior to my induction date. At first I wasn’t sure if it broke or not, so I asked my mom what it felt like. She said it feels like you’re uncontrollably peeing on yourself. Soon after that, about 15 minutes, I was confirmed of my water breaking because liquid started pouring out, lol. I didn’t call the Doctor nor did I go to the hospital. I waited until I started having contractions 5-10 apart for an hour like my doctors instructed, which didn’t happen until 18 hours later. Bad idea for me to not go in right away because of the risk of infection, but how was I supposed to know? This is my first time having a baby, and BOTH of my GYN’s told me not to come in until I started having contractions. There was no mention of my water breaking. And since I’m totally healthy, I didn’t think there was any reason for me or my baby to develop an “infection”. According to what I researched, the vaginal exams are what cause infections in the first place, which makes complete sense to me.
So the next morning around 6am I started having mild contractions, then they increased in pain and decreased in time apart, so by 8 am Jacob and I were on our way to the hospital. When we got there the nurses asked me if my water broke & I told them yes it did, yesterday afternoon. They all looked at me like I was crazy and asked why I waited so long to come in. I told them that I didn’t feel the need to come in because everything seemed fine and that my Doctor told me not to come in until I was having contractions, so I was simply following instructions. Well, when they started my IV they told me they were going to start me on antibiotics. In shock I asked “for what?” And the nurse said “the GBS that you’re positive for”. I was in total disbelief and said “excuse me, but what in the world are you talking about?” She explained to me that I was positive for Group B Strep, (the test they give you when you’re 36 weeks) and that the baby has been swimming in infected amniotic fluid for the entire time since my water broke. GBS (Group B Strep) is a bacteria that is carried by both men and women, that does not affect adults but can be very harmful for unborn babies, which is why pregnant women ate tested for it at 36 weeks. Men will never know if they have it or not because they will never be tested for it since they obviously can’t get pregnant. Well when I took the test, nothing was ever mentioned about it after that, so I assumed I was negative. I would expect a Doctor to tell you the results of your tests, ESPECIALLY if you’re positive for it, don’t you?! So yeah, I was carrying this infection and had no idea about it. I was infuriated by this new found information because now my baby is at risk. If I would’ve known about this infection, I would’ve been at the hospital the day before when my water broke.
Anyways, once your water breaks you have 24 hours to get the baby out or it can become something serious. So I had 6 hours to deliver my daughter and I was only 2 cm dilated (and have been for two weeks!). They started me on pitocin right away. 2 hours later they checked my cervix to find that I was still only 2 cm dilated, so a c-section was the final decision. At first I wanted to cry because I felt cheated out of my wanting for a natural delivery since I was never informed about this infection that could be potentially fatal to my unborn daughter. I also was not so phsyched about having such a dramatic surgery, especially since I’ve never had surgery of any kind. I asked the nurses if they had c-sections and even asked if I could see their scars because I also wasn’t very excited about having such a large scar on my belly. One of the young nurses showed me not her scar because it was so low, but pulled her shirt up just to show me that the scar was below her panty line. I couldn’t even see it! And she was so skinny you wouldn’t even be able to tell that she had a baby, and she had 2! So that made me feel A LOT better about it. So on we went with the procedure.
They had me fill out all kinds of forms and explained to Jacob and I what would be happening. He had to change into scrubs so he could be there with me while the doctors carried me into the operation room so they could numb me from the waist down. They gave me a spinal anesthetic that literally took 5 seconds to kick in. I felt a rush of a numbing sensation that actually felt really good, lol! I felt very shaky though shortly afterwards which I didn’t like too much. Also, the shot they gave me was a MUCH smaller needle than that of the epidural, which I was very happy about because that was the very reason I had decided I wasn’t going to have an epidural if this would’ve happened naturally.
They cut me open and tugged, pushed and pulled (which I could feel a lot of although it didn’t hurt, it was just a lot of pressure) and then out came the baby, 7lbs. and 14oz. of her. About a minute later I heard her first cry and was in tears at the amazing sound that I had waited 9 long months to hear. Jacob cried with me and we were both very happy. However, because she was infected, they took her from us right away. I got to see her and kiss her cheek before she left and dad asked to see her hair because she was wearing a cap. When they took it off, we were amazed to see a head full of dark hair, just like I dreamed about!
So they took me to the recovery room while we waited to hear from the doctor’s what was going on with Natalia. Now there are a lot of details to what was happening between the surgery and the end, so I’m just going to make the long story short: The doctors were concerned about her breathing patterns. They ran blood tests and white blood cell tests which came back triple the amount of what was normal, meaning that her body was already building white blood cells to fight off whatever infection she had. They were also concerned about some “seizure-like episodes” that she was supposedly having which made the nurses decide to transfer her to Wolfson Children’s Hospital in Jacksonville because they were a small town hospital that did not have all the tools needed to run the tests they wanted her to have. They weren’t sure what she was doing because she’s a newborn, hence their wanting to run tests just to make sure she was acting normal. I was completely devastated because the doctors made it seem like she was having all these problems, they even mentioned a possibility of meningitis. I cried so hard and asked “what are they going to do to my baby?!” Jacob tried his hardest to keep his composure because I was so upset about everything and then he broke down and started crying with me.
Natalia went through so much in the first days of her life in the outside world. She IV’s since she was born, she had all kinds of tests run on her, she had MRI’s she had her spine tapped, all kinds of bullshit. I know that they were just trying to be on the safe side, but what new mom wants to see her first baby go through all this trauma?! Anyways, in the end Natalia was completely fine. They ran all these tests just to find nothing wrong with her. She just had an infection and the antibiotics they started me on before the surgery killed it just in time. So we went through all this heartache for nothing. It was very crazy. We ended up being in the hospital for 5 days before finally bringing her home.I was in the hospital for 3 days recovering from the surgery. They transferred Natalia on my second day of recovery so I couldn’t even go to the hospital to be with my baby until the next day. Jacob had to drive from Lake City to Jacksonville, back to Lake City to pick me up, back to Jacksonville so we could be at the hospital every day and then finally back to Lake City so we could come home, and then he had to drive back so he could go home, lol! Lots and lots of driving.
At the end of the day, there were a lot of lessons learned from this entire experience. Although it was scary, it was very worth it and I am happy to say that I am a new mom to a very happy and healthy baby girl. According to her pediatrician she eats better than the average baby for her size and is growing at a great rate. She is such a good baby, hardly ever cries unless she needs something. She is always very content and has such a well-developed personality already. She’s definitely mommy and daddy’s little diva girl!
I also would like to mention that my perspective about c-sections have dramatically changed since I underwent the surgery. I actually prefer to have the c-section because I didn’t have to feel any pain WHATSOEVER, everything went by so quick it was unbelievable. The entire procedure took a total of 55 minutes. No contractions, no pain, GREAT pain meds during and afterwards lol, and my little girls head did not get squished and my vagina didn’t rip! The scar is barely noticeable, looks like a pen line just below my bikini line and nobody will ever be able to see it unless I show them, which means I can still wear my bikini this summer! Best of all, this entire event brought me and Jacob closer together and he loves me more now than ever before since having to be there with me and watching me go through all of this craziness. I definitely want to share my story because I think it’s well worth mentioning to people. Always prepare for the worst because you never know what’s going to happen, and always be optimistic about negative things that you have no control over because they are not always as bad as they seem.
Today my baby girl is 2 weeks and 3 days old and she is making the cutest “ooh” and “ahh” sounds, she picks her head up all by herself to look around because she wants to see everything, she will NOT fall asleep without being held, so she’s already spoiled, lol! (Thanks Jacob!)
One more thing I want to add before I conclude my super long birth story; because Natalia was taken from me right from the beginning, we didn’t get to experience the first bonding of mother and baby to establish breastfeeding, which is essential! And I am completely against giving my baby formula for several reasons. One because I’m pro-natural, two because I don’t feel that formula gives babies everything they need like breast milk does, three because of all the side effects that come from formula fed babies that I’ve researched, such as being more prone to obesity and becoming sick with diseases, and four because although the formula feeds the baby for longer periods of time (formula fed babies eat 6-10 times a day vs. breastfed babies eat 8-12 times a day) which means the formula “sits” in their stomachs and that just reminds me of McDonald’s food which is totally gross in my opinion. I already decided I wanted to breastfeed exclusively. Well since I didn’t get to breastfeed for the first week, I didn’t establish a good milk supply, so I couldn’t produce enough milk to feed my baby. Not only that but the doctors shoved bottles and pacifiers in my newborn baby’s mouth which pissed me the **** off! If they needed to syringe feed her then okay, but I was not about the pacifiers or bottles because of nipple confusion. So Natalia had a difficult time latching on for the first week and a half of our being together. It was making me sore and I was to the point where I was about to just give up all together. But then I decided “screw that!” I’m not going to give up because I WANT this for my baby, so I’m going to MAKE SURE it happens, no matter what it takes. If I have to breastfeed her every half hour then so be it. I consulted with a lactation specialist who was so inspired by my determination and told me that that’s what it takes, you have to really want to breastfeed for it to work out, which is what I truly want, exclusively. I only will use formula if I have to supplement, but otherwise I want to strictly breastfeed my baby mostly because it’s the healthiest for her, but also because it does establish a bonding relationship with you and your baby that just feels like pure love, and I want that with me and Natalia. So I have a $700 hospital grade breast pump that I’m using FOR FREE for a week-2 weeks just because my lactation specialist wants to help me because she sees how bad I want this. Unfortunately Natalia and I had a rough start, but now that things are back to normal we are going to work this out to both of our benefits. My advice to anybody else out there with this problem is to never give up on the things that you truly want. I am proud to say that Natalia has gotten MUCH better about latching on (although she still needs some improvement) and I am finally being able to produce enough milk to catch up with her needs. (:
In case any of my followers/readers are wondering where I’ve been, I’ve been busy at home with my newborn Baby girl Natalia. So as you can imagine I’ve been pretty busy adjusting to my new lifestyle, which means I haven’t had much time to Blog as much as I’d like! Well things are finally calming down as my daughter and I are getting to know each other. I’m finally finding time to continue doing the things I love as well as being the best mom I can possibly be. I have some blogs to post from before I had Natalia as well as my birth experience and blogs from afterwards! So tune in to my upcoming posts because they will be well worth the wait ♥♡♥♡♥
Here’s some photos I took so far (:
Our beautiful baby girl was born yesterday! My water broke the day before at 2pm and I did not go to the hospital until 8am yesterday morning. When we got to the hospital I was already contracting 10 minutes apart for an hour, which is when my nurse told me to head to the hospital. When I got to the hospital, the nurses asked me if my water broke and I told them yes it had, yesterday at 2pm ad they were all in complete shock because they said I should’ve came in as soon as my water broke. Little did I know, because my instructions were to come in when I started having contractions. Since my water broke at 2 pm the day before, I had to have the baby out of me within 24 hours, and it was already 9:00am, giving me until 2 pm that day to deliver Natalia. They started me on pitocin right away to go ahead and have me dilating because when I had my vaginal exam, I was only dilated 2 cm. My delivering doctor wanted me to start labor on my own since I was already contracting. A couple hours later they checked my cervix again and I was still only 2 cm dilated. So I had 2 hours to dilate 8 cm. which obviously wasn’t going to happen, especially this being my first baby. So a cesarean was in order. I was very upset to have to go the c-section route because I really did not want to have this major abdominal surgery and be left with a terrible scar, but we needed to do what was best for the baby because she could be at risk for infection with my water being broken for almost 24 hours.
We had the c-section where she was born at 1:12 pm yesterday afternoon. The procedure took a total of 55 minutes, I didn’t have to go through the pain because they numbed me from the top of my waist down, there were nothing but positive outcomes really! The only bad part about the whole procedure was the scar and the recovery, HOWEVER the scar is not even bad, it’s so low nobody will ever be able to see it unless I show it to them, even when wearing a bikini, and the recovery isn’t taking anywhere near as long as I expected because it’s already been almost 30 hours and I’m already walking around fine, squatting (slowly) taking showers, cleaning, doing everything really but taking it easy as the doctor instructed. I expect to be completely normal in a week. (:
The baby and I haven’t been discharged from he hospital yet but I am very anxious to bring her home to sleep in her beautiful room that I decorated so nice for her. I’m am so excited to have her home with my little family and am extremely happy that she is finally here! I am the happiest woman in the whole world. Motherhood is an indescribable feeling and I LOVE being a new mom to such a perfect little angel. She truly is my heart and soul. I gave her life and she gave me a reason to live .<3
*41 Weeks & 2 Days Pregnant Today
*150 lbs. – 40 lbs. Gained Since Pre-Pregnancy
Well, still no baby. I’m getting so impatient! But I’m trying to keep calm and not think about it so much because I know she will be here very soon. As a matter of fact she won’t be here no later than Monday because yesterday my Doctor told me that if she hasn’t come yet, they will have to induce me. Jacob and I went to my doctor appointment yesterday because I was 41 weeks yesterday and Ms. Marlene wanted to do a fetal stress test (NST – No Stress Test) to make sure that the baby wasn’t stressed out which would be the reason she hasn’t come yet. I don’t know exactly if the results were good or bad, but I was sent to the hospital right after. She sent me to the hospital to do a labor test because as I got my pelvic exam done before the NST, Ms. Marlene sweeped my cervix and stripped the membranes. When she was done I started leaking blood. Because of the blood, she wanted me sent to the hospital to make sure that it wasn’t something to do with the placenta and just her irritating my cervix, because if I was bleeding internally, they would have to induce me right away to keep from infection.
When we got to the hospital, they did something similar to a pap smear and sent my results to the lab. 30 minutes later they came back and told me everything was fine and that my water had not broken yet. At that point they sent me home. I got a little taste of what it’s going to be like when I’m actually in the hospital giving birth. The nurses there were very nice and asked me all kinds of health questions. When they asked me about the vaccinations (offering them to me and asking if they were up to date) I politely refused and told them no they were not up to date and I didn’t plan on getting any because I’m against them. The doctor’s did not seem to care, which I was grateful for because I expected them to push them on me since that’s what most doctors do. I then overheard a conversation the nurses had with each other saying that vaccinations were no longer going to be protocol and the nurse made a comment saying “good, they don’t need to be”. This reassures me that I’m obviously not the only one who is against vaccines which I am very happy to hear because the last thing I want to do immediately after giving birth is have to fight for my right not to vaccinate my baby with a doctor. I don’t think I will have to do that at this hospital. (:
After leaving the hospital Jacob and I went on a very long and bumpy ride, took a long walk, got something spicy to eat, he gave me a massage, we tried to do every natural way to induce me because I read forums from other women who had their membranes ruptured by the doctor and they all said that they went into labor within 49 hours, some on the same day. So we were expecting that to happen. But no, it’s the next day and Jacob already left Lake City to go to work in Jacksonville since he missed work yesterday to be with me at my appointment. I, as well as everybody else, believe that the full moon tomorrow night will help bring the baby into the world. I’m really hoping so because I would hate for them to induce me. I’ve read all kinds of things about being induced with Pitocin and I’m not very excited about what I read and what will be having to look forward to if that’s the route I’m going to be asked to take by my doctors. But I’m not too worried about it because somehow I have a feeling she will be here no later than Friday. I’m going to continue going about my day normally and doing normal activities. But if anything changes, expect a blog about it! ❤